What would family life be without all the conversations?  The last couple of weeks, since we are in December and Christmas is soon to be upon us, the Middles and the Littles have been having some interesting debates over some of the finer points of Christmas.

The first was between two of the Middles (both 5). (And, I admit, because I have slept multiple times since I heard this one, it may be off in the exact wording, though not in the ideas expressed.)

Adeline:  I can't wait until Santa comes.

Andrew: You know Santa is just pretend.

Adeline:  No he isn't!

Andrew:  Yes he is!

Adeline:  Well, I've seen him.  I saw him at Silver Dollar City.

Andrew: That was just a person dressed up in a Santa suit.

Adeline: Haven't you ever woke up on Christmas morning and there were a lot of presents under the tree that weren't there the night before?  See, he is real.

Andrew: That's just your parents that put them there.

Adeline and Andrew together: Grandma????

Grandma:  This is something you need to ask your parents, not me! (I am not chicken or anything....)

The second conversation was more recent and was between two of the Littles (both 2).

Toliver: Santa is coming to my house.

Linus: Santa is coming to my house.

Toliver: No, he is coming to my house!

Linus: He is too coming to my house!

Linus: (Turning to look at me with a big grin) Grandma, I bewieve in Santa!

Caveat: The next evening as we were driving home from church, Linus' older brother Chappell said, "Linus doesn't believe in Santa anymore."

I am curious how that came about.

(To see a post about a different girl in our family that believed in Santa for ever-so-long go to https://fernnookfarmgirl.blogspot.com/2006/11/mayberry-meanderings-in-august-we-have.html) 

This is one of my favorite pictures of some of my favorite people.
We all have one thing in common...we are short.  It isn't so obvious
here because we are all short and so there is no one tall to compare
us with.  Well, Tandy, is close to medium, but not quite there.

Something funny happened to me today as I was in and out of
stores and other places in Poplar Bluff.  Actually, two funny things
happened and it just so happened that they happened on the same
day.  And that is what makes it so funny...in an odd sort of way.

First, I was in line at Burger King.  In front of me, and ordering, was
a lady with a young boy.  He looked to be an older four or a younger
five year old.  They were dining in and so they were given a number
to put on their table.  The little boy was holding it, and he asked if
it was a big number (it happened to be 12).  Never shy of speaking up,
I said, "It's a pretty big number."  And, I smiled at him.  A minute or
so later, he looked at me again and said, "Are you a grown-up or a
kid?"  I had to laugh!  "I am a grown-up, but I am a very short grown-up!"

Not long after that, I was walking into the entrance at Wal-Mart.  A young
man was walking in and had a loud rap song playing on his phone.  He
stopped and motioned me to go in before him, and I smiled at him.  As
we got into the store, he said to me, "How old are you?  You are so short!"
I told him that I was knocking on 60, and he said, "No way!"

Maybe I am shrinking.  I always said that someday I would be just an oil
spot on the floor...like the grandpa in The Old Crippled Goose story that
dad tells.

We traveled with Peter and Judah to Natalie's brother's wedding last week.
We volunteered to take the boys so that Natalie could stretch her poor legs
out in the back of the van.  It was a lovely wedding, but some funny things
happened along the way.

Peter, on the drive down, kept saying, "I don't see Georgia, I just don't see
Georgia."  We kept assuring him that, indeed, we were headed to Georgia
and would be there soon.  When we finally got to the airbnb place that we
had booked, he got out of the car and said with great distress in his voice,
"This ISN'T Georgia!"

That was when we realized that Grandma Joan and Grandpa Peter's house is
Georgia in that boy's mind.  Of course it is.  Every time they get in the van
and head to Georgia they go straight to the Gagliardi's house.

Peter also told me several times while they were with us that, "I do not like
pertatoes Grandma."

Judah just said over and over, "Go, go, go, go, et's go!"

But, I have to tell a funny on myself also.  When we sat down at the reception, we
were across from Natalie's uncle and his girlfriend, whom we had never met.  They
were lovely people.  We were just getting acquainted when I reached for my cup of
water and took a large swig of Italian dressing instead.  The dressing was in the same
type of cup as the drinks.  My eyes popped wide open, and I quickly set down the
cup of dressing.  Mike (the uncle) out of embarrassment for me picked it up and placed
it in front of his girlfriend, Jennifer.  She obviously didn't want anything to do with it,
after I had taken a swig from it, so she just shoved it aside.  Then we all chuckled and
settled down to enjoy the rest of the evening.

I watched these two (Kathleen, Colyn) and little Judah today while
Natalie went to the doctor.  Peeta went with her.  He's been a little
clingy lately.

This picture wasn't from today, but was from several months ago, at
the beginning of spring.

Today was sprinkler weather.

They had a busy, imaginative day.

First, Kathleen informed me they were green gum-ball lizards.  These
type of lizards live in gum-ball (sweetgum) trees and eat green gum-
balls and green gum-ball leaves.  They looked more like possums as
they hung upside down from the lowest branches.

Then Colyn was able to climb the 2nd climbing tree all by himself for
the first time.  We have a little climbing tree they have been using for
a few years, but I told them they could begin to climb the maple in the
backyard whenever they could get into it by themselves.  Kathleen has
been able to for some time, but today was Colyn's first.

Then they came inside and played a long time.  They called each other
up from one pretend house to the other.

Colyn--Kathleen would you like to go to the jungle with me?

Kathleen--Sure!

Colyn--Well, I can't leave yet because I forgot to brush my teeth and
there is dirty laundry to fold.

Then, when they went back outside to play in the sprinkler, they were
wallowing in a puddle.  "Grandma, we're wet, gooey frogs.  Do you know
why they are called that?  Because they're wet and gooey."

I forgot to mention in the last Up and Down the Gravel that Uncle Jim broke
his foot last week.  He's off to Pocahontas tomorrow to have it examined
by a bone doctor.  He's hoping to get a boot and not a cast.

Our hummingbirds are humming along.  I have four feeders and a dozen or
so birds are busily zipping between them.  A few days ago, I spooked an
oriole on one of the feeders.  He quickly flew off and didn't return.  Then
today I received a text from Natalie saying that she had indigo buntings,
orioles, and cardinals on her feeders (some of the birds were on her
seed feeders, but the orioles were on the hummingbird feeders.)  It wasn't
but a couple of minutes and two orioles appeared on our living room feeder.
Their bright orange is astonishing to see up close.  We tried to not make any
sudden moves.  Tyler captured this picture, but the shadows make the stunning
color hard to see.

Adeline Shirley (and her parents) made her first visit to the Farmhouse at
Fernnook today.  We had a lovely time holding and loving on her.  Tyler
planted more of his garden (he has promised me lots of okra this year)
and Jennifer visited inside with us.

I was explaining to Kathleen yesterday that Tyler & Jenn are planning on
moving to behind the old barn someday, and that she could then walk
through two fields and over a (not-yet-built) stile and could then take the
lane back to their house and visit her cousins.

She answered me back, "Wait a minute!  You mean Tyler and Jennifer used
to live in the brown house, and now they live in another house, and then
they are going to move again?  WHY DO THEY KEEP MOVING?"

She just couldn't fathom that.  But I think I explained it adequately to her.

June bugs were hitting the windows tonight.  Whippoorwills are whippering.
The moon is shining brightly.  Lovely, lovely May.

As seen on Facebook:

Opal: How long does it take to get to America?
Bill: We are in America!  Let's name some other countries. 
             China, Rusia....
Elsie: Texas!
Opal: Chick-fil-a!

Though she isn't exactly a kid, Hattie said something quite
humorous the other day.  She was be-bopping around the house
and suddenly looked at me and said, "If I wasn't me, I'd want to
be my best friend!" 

Then when Kathleen found out that I was going to be riding in
her van for the first half of a trip to Georgia to visit Natalie's
family and that Grandma Joan would be in the van for the
second half, she said, "That is a great idea!  Then I can talk the
whole way, and the trip will seem short to me!"

Kathleen, Colyn, and Peeta are staying the week with us because Natalie

is in Georgia for her brother's kidney transplant.  We have been having

a rip-roaring time, and after they are in bed, we get to sharing the

different things they have said and done, and it is pretty amusing.

The kids were apparently given strict instructions about what to say 

and not to say while they are here.  I know this, because Kathleen 

keeps telling people what they are not supposed to say.  The other 

day she went up to Hattie and whispered in her ear, "Mom told us 

not to say the word 'fart' when we are here because Grandma Laurie 

doesn't like it.  We are supposed to say, 'toot,' instead. 

It is true, I have a thing about certain words.  I always had my kids say

"toot" because "fart" sounds so very crude.  My boys, when they want

to tease me, remind me that they were the only kids in Mayberry who

said, "toot".

Yesterday they were in the haybarn with Grandpa Kent.  This is what he

overheard Kathleen reminding her brothers, "Remember, don't say words 

like 'buttcrack' because Grandma Laurie doesn't like it."  Well, "butt"

is a crude word (in my dictionary).  I much prefer "bottom" or "bum"

or "rear end".  Just humor me, okay!

Kent told me this, and we laughed, but the real funny came at dinner time

yesterday.  It was just the kids and me and we were talking about manners.

Kathleen (yes she loves to talk) was getting onto Colyn for not saying,

"Excuse me," when he burped.

Here is what she said.  "Well, I have manners.  Well, I have one manner that

is.  I say, 'Excuse me,' when I burp.  Well, I do have one other manner.   I say,

'Excuse me,' when I (hesitation clearly visible on her face) toot."

Her dad used to be the policeman of his brothers also.  They were on a trip

with Opa & Oma one time when he was about 9.  They were all watching

something on TV and there was kissing.  So Joel ordered, "Cover your eyes,

boys."  And to this day, Oma hoots over the way they all instantly obeyed,

and the three boys all turned their heads and covered their eyes.

Let's see.  What has been going on Up and Down the Gravel. The company is
all gone.  Things have seemed quite quiet in some ways, but life continues.

Uncle Jim is driving his own car again.  It has been awhile, and there have
been several issues, but hopefully they are resolved, at least for a bit.  Hattie
had a letter in the mailbox today address from G'ma Opal (though I suspect
Uncle Jim had a hand in delivering it...I recognize his handwriting.)  In the
envelope was a homemade card that Hattie had given to G'ma a number of
years ago.  Uncle Jim is thoughtful like that.  It is now safely filed away in
our Special Letter's File.

Mike and Debby are on a whirlwind tour of their various kids houses so that
they can celebrate Christmas with each of them and then be back here to
celebrate it with us.

Papa Bob's sawmill is on the bunk.  He has spent several days working to
repair it.  The last I heard he said something about their being gas in the
oil...or oil in the gas.  Anyway, he may need to take the engine to a shop
at Poplar Bluff.  That reminds me, tonight I learned from him the difference
between a motor and an engine.  A motor is electric, and an engine runs on some
type of fuel.

Tyler is building a hay feeding lean-to on the back of our shed.  The hardest
part of building anything is getting it squared up.  One of The Rattlesnake Boys
was helping us build our woodshed years ago and to square it up he said,
"3+4=5".  That was his hillbilly way of putting the Pythagorean Theorem to
good use.

Kent and I have sometimes spent days trying to get a building square.  I am sure
we almost divorced over squaring up our barn.  Anyway, between the three
of us, Kent, Tyler, and me, we were able to get the new hay-feeding lean-to
close enough to square to work.

Our friend, Doug, gave me a good line this past week.  He said, "Laurie, if
you ever want to get out of doing something, just say, 'I'm so sorry, but my
avacados will be ripe between 8 and 8:15 tomorrow night.'"  It is so funny
because it is so true.  Avacados are not ripe, not ripe, not ripe, ripe ( for about
15 minutes and perfect to work up), and then too ripe, too ripe, too ripe.

One more funny.  During deer season Bill, Stacey, and the kids were here.
Wilbur was looking at the deer mounts on our wall.  We were talking about
them, and he said, "Deer dead?"  "Yes, Wilbur the deer are dead."  "Deer
died on the cross?"  "No, Wilbur, not on the cross!"

This was just too, too good to not give you. After
Bible Study tonight I asked Hattie why it was so
loud upstairs.

She said, "Because Jon Michael was running in the
cemetery."

I looked confused; I know I must have looked very
confused, because she put her hands on either side
of my face and said, "You know, the place where Dad
preaches."

I looked at Kent, with a smirk, and had to laugh.
"So that's how the congregation looks to you."

PS-I think Hattie was doing her share of running
in the sanc...er cemetery.